I am new to this forum and have been reading thru some of the questions and answers. Just to get a feel for what goes in here. And in a question someine wrote of their 93 year old mother. And as he described her life and her level of functioning I became more and more despondant. He could have been describing my life. My life for the last 5 years. And Im only 57 years old.
I am essentually bedridden. I become breathless and exhausted with ANY activity. I cannot walk from my bed to the bathroom without difficulty. Walking from my bedroom to the livingroom reduces me to a lump of weezing choking crying paniky mess because I cant get a breath. So I go back to my bed. I can not comfortably sit up in a livingroom chair long enough to watch a little bit of tv because I get exhausted at just having to sit upright. I have copd but also chronic lower back pain, nerve pain in my feet severe, and I dint know what else arthritus? Fibromyalgia? But most days my elbows, knees, and shoulders hurt. So much in the morning that I am in tears before I ever leave my bed. I also have high blood pressure.
I know I need exercise if I ever hope to get better but how can I exercise if any exertion whatso ever cause severe shortness of breath. My heatrate shoots way up, I feel like I will throw up, I sweat profusely. But I am desparate. This is no way to live. I think about having to live like this for the next 20 or even 10 or 5 years and I become suicidal. I am so completely bored. Everyday is forever to get thru with nothing to do. Nothing to do that I can do.
I feel as if all I am doing is sitting here waiting to die. The most mundane thungs are a major problem. I dont bath enough because it is so exhausting. I am a complete mess by the time I am done. And because I need a shower and to get dressed to be able to go anywhere I just dont go anywhere I dont have to anymore. I dont even try anymore. If there is something If like to do by the tume I have showered and dressed I am such a mess that I have to go back to bed. My back will hurt so bad I cant walk. I eill have sweated so much that the bath was pointless.
If I have to live like this forever then there is no point to being alive because this is at best mind numbingly boring to severely painfull just to exist.
I am desparate for some help. I feel like what I need is to have someone right here with me to say ok now do this now do that. Because I dont know how to do this. I mean, I am afraid to leave the house to try and go walking. I dont mean to sound helpless. But I honestly feel helpless. Any suggestions that take the limitations Ive listed into account would be appreciated. And I dont mean that I wont/cant challenge thise limiltations. I will gladly. As long as they are within my reality. What I mean is. People will say walking is the best exercise, try walking. Ok, but how can I do that when I cant wear any closed toe shoes and even sox hurt my feet. When I am depleted before I can get out of the door. i am afraid I will get 10 feet down the road and wont be able to make it home. So please dont suggest I start walking.
Thank you ahead of time. I will read and take serious consideratiin of every answer.