When I was working in pulmonary rehab, new patients would come in for their initial assessment. When the assessment was done and they were about to leave, they’d often say, "I feel much better about things now than I did when I got here today. This sounds good, but to be honest, I don't know if I'll be able to do this. It might all be just too much for me."
I would tell them, "Don't worry. All you have to do is get yourself in here and leave the rest to us. All we ask is that you show up and do your best. We will help you, and you'll be fine.”
"Just show up." It sounds so simple, but sometimes it takes a lot of effort...and a whole lot of courage.
Here's the story of a walk I once took and the thoughts I had along the way. I hope you are inspired by the neighbors who, simply, kept on showing up and doing their best.
Circa 2004, an early fall evening in West Michigan.
Come along and walk with me on my evening walk. Part of my route goes around the perimeter of our town’s high school campus—past the classroom buildings, the performing arts center, and all the way around the athletic fields. Often, I pass the football team as they’re practicing. Not all that long ago, this high school football team had a terrible stretch with several losing seasons. There were some years when they didn’t win a single game. We celebrated when a point, any point at all, was scored. Bad times.
Other teams in the conference enjoyed increasing school enrollment, boosted by the development of former farmland into new subdivisions—some of them with large luxury homes. At the same time our high school enrollment went down, and this old neighborhood landlocked in the center of the city, remained the same—block after block after block of narrow city lots, many with 100+ year old housing stock that is often difficult and costly to maintain.
And more recently, withstanding the ravages of an unemployment rate of over 20%, a lot of moms and dads were barely able to keep food on the table and a roof over their heads; let alone pay for their kids’ sports equipment—not to mention tuition for elite football camps.
But they played. The kids kept on showing up. Good kids of many shades and cultures, all part of the American melting pot that is this old neighborhood. They showed up. At practice. At games. One after the other after the other. Years of losses. The parents, the cheerleaders, the friends, the girlfriends, the band—and the team, they just kept showing up. And they played their hearts out.
This year on the first Friday night of high school football, the sports announcer opened the broadcast with news of an upset. Our town’s high school football team beat a team that had been undefeated the year before!
I continue to walk. The sound of football practice is now distant, and I walk past the offices of an old factory that makes car parts. This place, too, has had its struggles. The workforce had dwindled, and those of us who live just a stone’s throw away wondered if this business, an economic pillar of our neighborhood, would survive. Tonight, I see a sign on the lawn outside the offices, “Now hiring.”
I turn the last corner and slow my walk, cooling down. I’m almost home. Not long ago in the factory’s big parking lot that used to be full during an evening shift, I could easily count the cars—about 10. I walk alongside the security fence surrounding the parking lot. I see 26 cars. The shift is over. Workers emerge—dirty, weary, lunch coolers in hand. One man gets on his bike and pedals away, heading for home. Tomorrow they’ll be back. They’ll show up. And here in this old neighborhood, I think we’re going to be okay.
Do you ever feel like throwing up your hands and saying, “Why bother? I can’t breathe and I’m only going to get worse anyway. Why… even…bother?”
Well, my friends, it’s important to know that no matter where you are on your COPD journey, showing up and doing your best will help you be more likely to make progress and maintain your best possible quality of life. Showing up can take many forms: going to pulmonary rehab or a breathing support group meeting in person or online, attending a club meeting or spiritual gathering, talking with a friend or neighbor, or maybe just being fully present in the moment.
Whatever it is, just show up and do the very best you can. When it comes right down to it, that’s all any of us can do, isn’t it? Keep on putting one foot in front of the other, show up, and do the very best you can. Don’t give up. You’re too brave for that. You’re too valued for that. You’re too worth it.
So, my dear friends, as I go... remember the spirit of the good folks in my old neighborhood. Keep on showing up, keep on doing the very best you can, and you’re going to be okay.
Do you have something to share with us about choosing to show up?
Let’s talk. We look forward to hearing from you!