Think back to the very first time it occurred to you that you might have COPD.
Did you think, “Well, if I do have it… maybe I’ll cope by just not accepting it. That’s it. I’ll deny that I have it. Because if I accept it, that means I’m giving in. And if I give in, that means I’m giving up. So, I’m going to ignore this whole thing and just push through. On the other hand, maybe you thought, “That would be the worst thing ever!” If I have COPD, I might as well go home, sit in my easy chair, and never get up again.”
Does accepting COPD mean you’re giving in and giving up? Maybe some folks look at it that way, but that’s not how it has to be. So, which is it? War or helpless surrender? Good grief, that sounds extreme! There’s got to be a middle ground. And there is – making peace with COPD.
It’s not easy to make peace with COPD. There are good days and bad days, and this disease is a constant presence in your life. It has a big impact on your emotional health, self-esteem, relationships, work habits, and overall outlook on everything. And your struggle with it may sometimes even cause you to feel like you’ve lost control of not only your breathing, but your life.
You can live at peace with COPD by looking at it head on, accepting what it is, and learning everything you can to live well with it. No doubt there are times when you won’t make the right choices, but you will learn from your mistakes. And you can also learn from others. By learning all you can and using that information to manage your COPD, you can have the peace that comes with doing the very best you can. Finding this balance will help you make it through.
Here are some unhealthy extremes, examples of being at war with COPD vs. giving up.
- You can keep your disease secret at the risk of deception – or talk about it constantly at the risk of self-pity.
- You can hold fast to your independence, insisting that your family treat you as normal and healthy – or you can let them coddle you at the risk of becoming dependent and child-like.
- You can look upon each good day as if you’ve “beat the system” – or you can live in terror of illness and death at the risk of being emotionally paralyzed.
- You can be angry about it at the risk of bitterness – or you can focus only on unicorns and rainbows at the risk of self-delusion.
It’s not easy to make peace with COPD. But it is possible. You can keep a balance for control of your disease, and your life.Where are you in your life with COPD? If you’re at peace with it, how did you get there? If you’re at peace with your COPD, do you still feel like you’re at war with it sometimes? If you’re not at peace with it, how can we help?